Friday, January 1, 2010

My wife is going on vacation in Peru with a girlfriend from work..


My wife is going on vacation in Peru with a girlfriend from work...?
without me of course. For two weeks. From May 18-June 1. I understand that her co-worker is going (she's actually from there) to spend her child's birthday with her (turning 9 I believe). My birthday also falls within this time frame. I am utterly furious that my spouse seems so adamant about going without any regards to how I feel. I wasn't invited and this isn't a trip with her family. I'm actually thinking of telling her that if she goes I won't be here if & when she comes back. She spends TOO much time with this friend and has recently taken a 4-day trip to northern California with her as well. She claims I don't like going places but I don't have a job that allows spontaneous trips and I can't go during school months (I'm trying get my BA). I'm tired of her ALWAYS placing her friends and family first & expecting me to be ok with it.
Marriage & Divorce - 12 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
I don't know the answer, but I do know that you shouldn't make a promise you won't keep. Don't threaten to leave unless you plan on really doing it. That only makes things worse.
2 :
Talk to her about all of this. Maybe she would prefer to be single and play with this friend instead of being married. If she doesn't have a job, I think it's time for her to get a career and quit playing.
3 :
While she is gone, change all the lock sin the house, send her stuff to storage and get rid of her A&*&SS.........!
4 :
Dude, I think your wife is bisexual. Sorry
5 :
I think she might be taking advantage of your lack of ability to go places, and since you can't go anywhere with her, she might be trying to get out. While it's not fair to her to expect her to stay with you all the time when you can go anywhere else, it's fair for her to expect you to be fine with her leaving you with other people all the time either. Maybe you should try to take a break from your job and go on a small trip with her. You might think she's being insensitive to you, but it POSSIBLY can be that you're being insensitive to her, because she might be hurt that you can't spend a lot of time with her. I don't know the details, I'm just laying out possibilities.
6 :
Sounds like she is very self centered and selfish, sorry to say. You two need to talk about this situation. All you can do. Good Luck!
7 :
She is not being understanding of your feelings at all and that is a BIG problem for your marriage. You should put your foot down so she'll know how serious you are about this. Personally, from the information that you have given, I think that she is extremely selfish.
8 :
Get rid of her then. You're not a priority. My gf is the same way, she loves to travel and I don't really care to, plus my job doesn't allow random getaways whenever I feel like it. She most of the time will travel with a friend, her mom, cousin, etc. That's fine with me. If I can't or won't go, she should go then. But I do make the effort to travel with her at times as to keep her happy. However, she would never plan a trip during my birthday, that's just F'd up. Especially since it's only a pleasure and not a business trip. So, get rid of her or have a talk with her. But just don't blow up on her and tell her when she comes back you won't be there, that won't work. Calmly discuss your concerns with her.
9 :
tell her how you feel. I've been through a similar situation ...my ex was selfish like that. all I can say is I warned her......ended up sleeping with two of her friends and a broad I met at a party in that week she was gone. I tried to warn her, but she didn't listen man. you don't leave your man at home alone for a week ladies..wake up.
10 :
Well if she JUST went on vacation then I would be a little annoyed too that she is going again, and on your birthday no less. My hubby hates to fly so I am planning a trip to Paris next year with two girlfriends but he is totally cool with it. Thats the difference. If you are not you need to say so. But don't tie her down if you are the homebody type. She shouldn't have to sit there with you and be bored to death just because you dont want to go places. Now, if that is not the case, tell her to stay her a** home and celebrate your birthday. Why is she so gung ho to be with her friend on the childs birthday? Thats weird. Thats family time...she should stay home. And thats a LONG time to be away too. I could see if it was a weekend thing. Damn
11 :
Honestly, if you can't go I don't see the big deal. Peru would be exciting and I personally would go. It's only two weeks, how insecure does someone have to be to try and control their spouse when you know for a fact the trip is with a female friend and not a possible lover? I would use the time she is away to have time alone to yourself, chill out at a coffee shop, do things that you wouldnt normally have time to do if you werent alone. :)
12 :
Take a nice long weekend with a good looking girl and relax with her. Or, if that isn't in the cards, get a hooker. Life is too short to have your nuts cut off.